Okay. The ugly truth emerges. I have no self discipline. I use food to make myself feel better. I made it from Monday to Thursday without giving in to a craving -
Enter give-in numero uno: taking the kids to see Cars 2 where I subsequently left the movie no less than 6 times for restroom, water, crying, etc. I completely missed the end of the movie. And this was WITH backup - I mean, Justin was there too!! So...I asked him to PUH-LEEZE get me some Milk Duds when he went to get popcorn...but, applaud me here, did NOT ask for a Dr. Pepper. small victory, yes?
Give-in numero dos: Friday...car needs new battery which means I have to take my children to Walmart and WAIT while this is taken care of. Upon arrival, I'm told "It's gonna be a while." I'm all, "really? because I only see one other car and there's NO ONE waiting around..." The response from this very sweet lady was, "uh, yeah, but he's the only one working and he has to do that oil change and then he's gonna go on his break." Break. It's 9:02 a.m. Who the heck gets a break at that time? I mean what time was the start of the shift - 5:30? Fortunately for my sanity, he didn't take a break, was speedy fast and they even gave my kids water bottles to hit each other with...we were outta there by 10:40ish...
but on our drive to run other errands the car was still acting all weird and kind of shaky at stoplights and that makes me panic...but I braved Fiesta because I needed stamps to mail our rent and other things...and we needed juice...so we went...and wouldn't you know it? My baby - my compliant and easy son - throws an all out fit in Fiesta (why do they put BLOWPOPS and BATMAN BALLOONS eye-level and within reach of toddlers at the checkout?!?)...so, we we get what we need (after a mid-aisle detour to the restroom!)...and as I'm snapping at my kids amidst the averted eyes of the other sympathetic parents of little children, I realize DANG IT, I forgot the stamps...so we had to go back in...it was way more awesome than it sounds...so, what did I do after yelling at my kids once they were safely buckled and sweating in their car seats? SONIC RUN, people. Large Dr. Pepper WITH vanilla, thank you very much.
And it pretty much spiraled from there...holiday weekend...homemade ice cream...chips/salsa...hamburgers...you know the drill...some things are pretty clear, in retrospect. I definitely use sweets/comfort food as just that - comfort - from stress, frustration, crankiness, socializing, etc. Giving that up isn't as easy (or even desirable) as I'd hoped...so I'm going to have to start at square one. Maybe even before THAT, by admitting that this actually IS an issue for me. There it is. I will continue to update...
